Is MIL being passive aggressive/trying to make statements with her ‘gifts’?
Husband and I received a book entitled ‘Live Well on Less Than you Think’ for Christmas from MIL…we are in our mid to late thirties, not just starting out, by the way. Husband makes a very good salary and has saved a substantial amount for retirement over the years- which his mother knows. MIL thinks world is too material and lives very modestly (on purpose) in a rural, isolated area.I was pissed at the ‘gift’ but didn’t tell husband…a couple of years ago I was experiencing a lot of stress at work and at the same time was working on completing an advanced degree in my field. Lo and behold I received a book from her entitled ‘Women Who Think Too Much’ (my husband had mentioned to her that I was experiencing stress at work, but did not go into detail. The stress was not affecting our marriage as we get along well and help each other through things like this). Even if DO think too much, I found it totally inappropriate to send me this book. Do these gifts seem passive aggressive?
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holiday gift
Have your husband suggest to her that you are saving more money than you should, and feel you don’t have enough stress in your life.
gifts for men
Good question. She could be P/A, but on the other hand, she could honestly be thinking that her gifts are good ones, targeted to what’s going on in your life right now. If she doesn’t criticize you in real life, or get involved in telling you what to do, I would just look at these as gifts that missed the mark in your opinion.
I think you were smart not to make an issue of it with your husband. Wait and see what you get next year (grin!)
Take care,
Kate
gifts
Honestly, It sounds like she really is trying to give you insightful books in a good way. If she doesn’t do anything else in daily life to present as passive aggressive, I would chalk it down to her not knowing any better that she is irritating the heck out of ya.
birthday gifts
She’s made it perfectly clear that she’s appointed herself to save you from yourself.
anniversary gifts
She probably is just trying to help and thinks she is. Just accept the “gifts”, stick them in a drawer and forget it.
Good luck with the MIL.